Friday, 8 January 2010

New years, Birthday, Good times

My other half has been visiting me the past couple of weeks which is why i have been quiet and distant. It has been very lovely and humbling to be craddled and cared about by someone for a change than how everyone else has been treating me.

Im pretty sure im done with people and friends, ive had enough of most of them apart from my family and the couple that have shown me they care, but im not hoping for it to last, not again.

Because of new years and my birthday recently I was considering giving them all a chance again and fool myself to think that they would give a damn. But because of me being wrong ive planned to delete nearly every contact from my phone and probably msn, apart from the ones that speak to me still.

This was also partly the reason i left facebook because people were adding me from the past that did'nt even include me in anything or barely speak to me before, so why should they start now? Plus the fact that i wont be tempted to browse others profile pages that i really dont want to even think about anymore or remember them cause they dont about me.

I finally made the choice to leave when a boy from highschool added me as a friend on facebook and the only memory i have of him is slamming a door in my face with his foot on purpose.

Ill probably put my memories and photographs of them in my 'memory folder' under my bed where i keep all my lovely things and treasures of people and places that were special in a time and place.

Im with my lovely now hes sleeping next to me...its nice to hear his shallow breaths and admire is handsome pretty face. The last thing i want to do is remember people that dont deserve my thoughts and feelings.

He comes from a place where it does'nt snow so the first day he got here we sled together it was wonderful. Even tho Ive been sick since that day and always cold he gave me bunny slippers and their softest of blankets to keep warm in.

It warms my heart to see him so happy, im truely blessed by such a wonderful and loving person. It has been snowing a lot all over Britain which stops us from doing many things. Ive not been able to get thought to college really because of the weather.

On new years we played this it belonged to my Gran and its a very fun game. Its called Bagatelle its pretty old and probably an antique now, their also pretty expensive these days. It was just me and my parents on new years and my lovely. We watched bad tv and ate food aswell.

My 21srt brirthday came and went it was'nt really a big deal, just stayed in the house for it really, their was plans but weather and family being busy made it not happen which i did'nt mind. I had plans for friends aswell months in adivce but because people are horrible it did'nt happen either.

I got the most beautiful roses ive ever seen as a gift it was wonderful i cant help but stare at them everytime i see them or caress them. First time ive ever been given roses in my life, it was pretty sepcial.
I also received many other pretty things including a rose made out of feathers that will never die, its enchanting and deliciously soft.

My sister made a full birthday cake ive never been given such a pretty cake before it was quite the surprise and joy to see, it was so pretty that i did not want to eat it or cut it up. ;A;

I also got a surprise visit from my longest well known friend, it was lovely and they gave me lovely things. It was a fun night of laughing and eating cake.

My family are so lovely and felt sad that we did'nt do anything for my bday that were going to Edinburgh tomorrow on a ghost tour and a meal. Then for a shopping spree on sunday and also probably for Japanese food which is a fav of mine which i look forward too.

My family and my lovely make me feel special in the smallest of ways, been brought back to reality the past couple of weeks has been interesting. Im looking forward to making personal art and college art again, its all clear and thought out in my head.

Well see...<3

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